Gay Marriage

I was just testifying in my mental moot court on the role of government in marriage/civil union and realized I never really understood how entrenched everyone's views are on these topics. It's kind a fun sliding scale to illustrate the same arbitrary balance point as you get on many moral/cultural issues when everyone agrees on something only because it's comfortable or pleasing to the majority. These are like consensus laws - no grounding in logic, just history.

The government vests a lot of different religious figures with the power to marry. They allow Christians, Muslims, Jews, Universal Life Church, whoever the fuck, to perform marriages between men and women. The idea there is that we're a pluralistic society - don't matter your stripes n all that...

But it's a little bit creepy that the government does vest these religious institutions with that power. It's not quite right that a judge can marry you, or a voodoo medicine man can marry you. We don't take this approach with your legal defense should you be charged with a crime, do we? You can use your public defender, hire a lawyer who passed the Bar, or... just bring your rabbi? I do seem to remember that you can choose to represent yourself, so maybe we do allow for some quirks more consistent that others related to personal freedoms.

If, from a legal standpoint, marriage is a legal arrangement, I'm not sure it matters who it's between. If it's about taxes and insurance beneficiaries and all that. Why should I not be able to enter into a legal contract with my roomate, my sister, or my three best friends? If we all agree to bear liability for each other, what's the difference?

Clearly it's something about the sex involved, right? We have a somewhat consistent and logical basis for most arrangements or partnerships that imply financial and legal obligations. Do people act so funny about marriage because the sex is implied in this one?

Fro Hat

Nuff said. This rocks!

When Animals Attack

There was a really well written article in GQ this month about animal attacks. I would paraphrase it for you, but Stevereads has basically synop-sized it for you. Totally worth checking out.

The animals are changing. We used to learn that the ability to use tools was the unique dominion of humans. Then we learned that chimps go fishing for ants. In David Attenborough's 'Life of Mammals' you can also see semi-domesticated chimps using manufactured tools - like a saw to cut wood.

As it turns out the definition was revised to allow that while certain animals can use tools, no other animal uses tools to hunt. Over the past 20 years, that too has slipped away. Chimps are now hunting using spears - and it seems that a younger generation is picking the skills up from one individual. This was the same deal with the nut-cracking technique in "Life of Mammals." If you don't learn it young, you can never master it. Kind of like a French accent.

One of the scariest things that's started happening according to this GQ article is the bird attacks. I find it seriously frightening. I guess I've always been a little scared of birds, but seriously - pigeons are everywhere in NYC. If this doesn't scare you...

Everyblock... creepy cool

Everyblock is basically geography based reporting. Described like this:

The easiest way to keep track of what’s happening on your block, in your neighborhood and all over your city — like restaurant inspections in Chinatown, crimes in the Loop or everything around 475 Kent Ave.

I messed around with it and found it eerily entrancing. It's all the great pseudo-stalker-y things that make the internet fun... Like that feeling when you first joined The Facebook and got to check everyone out. This is like that, but more real and intimate.

You get to check out all the forms of public information that you would never check - or even know existed. From restaurant inspections, to building violations, noise complaints, arrests... and that's just the background of the tapestry.

You also get the mentions in the news, the photos from flickr, and juiciest of all... the missed connections on craigslist.

From all of this, you get the sense of what's going on in people's homes. What's going on out on the street. Where you definitely need to stop eating. It's all there.

It's fascinating, but maybe not endlessly... I worry that it could fall the way of The Facebook. That after a few aggressive bouts of geo-stalking, and neighbrowsing, I might have enough.

There are probably practical reasons that this type of data bundling will be really valuable - like for realtors or people thinking of moving in. It could even be a great way to check out what's going on this weekend if I feel like going out... but not too far... if I went out...

Wake-and-pee-dia

Wake-and-pee-dia: When the thing that gets you up is the daily pee boner.

Juno

Just saw Juno- and juno what? I really liked it. It felt honest and specific. The dialogue was really tight and snappy. Ellen Page was incredible. Michael Cera is the business, but he doesn't actually figure too large. Juno is the central character and she totally carries the movie.

I think specific is a good way to describe what I liked about this movie. When you feel like you're really stepping into a particular world or reality for a bit. It doesn't feel like the characters are archetypes put in a quirky situation. It's much more authentic than that. The story feels like it's driven by these particular quirky characters. Kinda like a Noah Baumbach movie.

I've heard a bunch of people debating back and forth whether this movie is pro-choice or anti-abortion. One of the greatest points I've seen on that is made by FWright in the New Republic Blog. It is hard to imagine a conservative motive when the alternative to abortion is a baby adopted by a single working mother.

The Global Sandwich

There is no doubt that we're falling behind in the international sandwich race. In a more global economy, our classics are now competing with a broader range of potential sandwiches. We've got some classic models in the US - I think we're probably leading the volume question with offerings and exports like Subway, Quiznos and others. Our best offerings are going to for fresh soft bread - toasted - and loaded up with a whole variety of fixin's.

Vietnamese sandwiches are a totally different bird and gaining ground in the states. that's a more crusty bread with some killer flavor combinations - like a great funky pate pulled chicken - and interesting texture touches like shredded carrots.

Felafel offerings in sandwiches also offer some great options and are growing in popularity around here. Great sauces and realy nice textures from whatever you load in there. I think felafel - with all the loading up is a lot more like an american sandwich because of all the stuff we jam in there.

One of the big things these two other imports are getting right is on the cost of ingredients. We're getting some delicious sandwich options at much lower prices.

One of the annoying things about Quizno's - and to a slightly lesser extent - Subway is that they're almost $10 for a big-ole sandwich.

Felafel and Vietnamese sandwiches are real good, but rely on cheaper ingredients. Mmmm delicious.

How do Torrents work?

I've been hearing a lot about torrents and how easy it is to get and share files this way. I decided to give it a shot and found it pretty easy. What I also found is that the system is initially hard to understand, but really a pretty simple context. I read the wikipedia entry and then talked with a few friends who were a little more conversant in the systems (and helped me figure out what to download to give it a shot.

Here's how it works: remember the heydey of napster when you could share any song in the world peer-to-peer? It's the same idea, but with a twist. When that was happening, we were actually sharing entire files with other users. I remember how annoying it would be when people would cut you off or they would go offline before the song finished downloading.

This worked okay when the files were song-sized. Now they're so many times that size because they're video files. Epsodes of TV or even whole movies. The great insight is that you split these big files up into a bunch of tiny chunks and create an index file. The index file is like a corn-cob that organizes the little kernels of the big file and indicates how they fit together.

Once a file is broken into the little chunks, you can download pieces of a movie from lots of different uses at the same time. The group is called a swarm - cool name, eh? The people you're downloading the kernels from are seeders. The people downloading the kernels to assemble a full ear of corn are called leechers.

One of the cool things about this system is that you can start to seed the kernels that you have complete before you have the whole ear of corn finished. I guess it's possible that you could be in a swarm with a few other leechers and complete each others' files even if nobody has a complete file to begin with.

Somehow, I think this also limits your liability for sharing proprietary files. Not sure about that. Does anybody know?

The Market is in the Toilet

Commode typically means a crapper. I think of it that way - as a fancy word for toilet. Apparently it comes from a word for convenience or measure because of the low sorts of cabinets that would house the chamber pots when fancy people began shitting indoors.

There's gotta be an etymological connection to the word commodity. Usually a commodity is something that is basic - not yet processed - and is traded. I'm having fun imaging the reciprocal connection between the meanings of these two words derived from 'convenience.'

Commode:
As consumers (in the sense that we eat) we take food as raw materials and we process it. Our output goes in the commode for convenience and we have greatly reduced the value of the raw goods we processed. The byproducts of this operation - the energy we burn - is the desirable product. The rest is shit we have to dispose of.

Commodity:
The raw materials of the world are traded and transformed. Ultimately they are combined and processed in a way that adds value. Then they are re-sold. Often the production requires a whole lot of energy and the by-products are a bunch of shit we have to dispose of.

Grilled cheese - art and science

Grilled cheese is one of those god-given pleasures that is very hard to get wrong. There are so many types of pleasures and additions that can really make a grilled cheese something special. There's a video on MSN about a $50 grilled cheese made with Fontina and truffles... that's definitely one way to go. There's sharp cheddar with some smoked turkey or tomato... mouthwatering.

I've enjoyed making grilled cheese in the waffle iron, lean-mean Foreman machine, frying pan and even under a broiler (more cheese toast than grilled that way). Really it's all fair-game except for the microwave. Don't bother with grilled cheese in a microwave- it's too easy to go all rubbery that way. Cheese can be microwaved on triscuits, but not more than 15 seconds for a plateful.

Butter is an absolutely essential component of successful grilled cheese - and about the only essential component. Butter on both sides of the bread is a great idea and buttering one side and then flipping it over is my preferred approach.

Today, I found myself without any butter and some good bread and cheese and a healthy case of the muncheese. My lady friend convinced me that the restaurant she used to work at would use mayonnaise. I was doobious, but a thin coat on the outside of the bread formed a perfect crust. I would definitely give this a shot in the frying pan. Haven't given it a whirl in the waffle iron yet. If you give it a try, keep the heat on medium and try not to let it smoke :)

Movies and Theaters

Obviously a lot of people go to the movies stoned. Pot gives any movie a half-a-thumb handicap. Many of us only go to movies stoned... If you're like me, choosing a showtime, you just add the smoke time into your calculations. If you've ever opted for a later showtime because you could make it, but might not have time for a decent session beforehand - you know what I mean.

Most often it's better to smoke-n-go, which requires a little bit of time at home and works best if you're near the theater. Danger is, it makes the whole process of choosing a movie and buying a ticket VERY challenging when you get to the theater. I recommend pre-ordering your tickets. In my mind it's well worth the extra $1 fee to pick up your e-ticket at the kiosk: avoid the line and the awkward human contact. There have been way too many times when I find myself saying an actor's name and forgetting the movie title when I actually make it to the ticket window. Not worth it... total buzzkill.

You can also choose to go-n-smoke somewhere near the theater. I used to do this more as a teenager or when life revolved around a car. If you're in the suburbs this probably means you end up smoking in a parking garage - or even more dangerous while driving. If you're in the city, this means smoking on the street. Either way, it's pretty risky. The only advantage there is that you're not blowing your high on commute time.

Once you're in, you've got decisions about snacks. I've always figured if you're going to get a soda, get a big one. My logic here revolves around the increased volume that will keep the soda cold more of the movie. A large can still be cold after an hour, but this all ends up leading to the inevitable need to take a piss during the movie. For me, it's not a question of whether or not I'll have to take a leak, but when... and how many times.

I always try to take preemptive action on the way in. In a group or on a date, I try to choose a seat first, but I definitely want to get to the bathroom before the movie starts. This is also helpful because I figure out the route so the during-the-movie-dash can be more efficient - it's less likely I'll get lost on my second visit somewhere.

The second piss - can be unpredictable. Usually the previews and the snack roller coaster are pretty good times to be in the theater - since you're at your most baked at that point. The demonstration of the surround sound is a good indicator of how well you've timed your high. This should be a religious experience if you've worked it out well.

After the movie is rolling - it's all about anticipeetion. I always try to time for a moment of exposition. Like when two people sit down for a heart-to-heart. Get up to and run out. I also try to leave after a big action sequence or comedic montage. In the end, when you gotta go, you gotta go. That's the way things are. I just try to hold out long enough that I only duck out once. When I'm stuck in the middle of a row at a crowded show, that's all I think my neighbors will tolerate.

Zoom Quilt

This has gotta be one of the greatest online collaborations I've seen. It's called a zoomquilt. Take yourself a couple of good rips and situate yourself with Weird Fishes or Air or something in your headphones. You're about to start falling through one digital drawing after another. Each of them is by a different artist and they must have worked out with each other how one was going to fit into the next one.